Oh scream! Oh shriek! No wonder the world thinks L.A. is garishly tasteless! No wonder the world needs this blog! There is more to Los Angeles than what tourists — and yours truly for about a half an hour–saw on Hollywood Blvd. over Labor Day weekend. It was the first time in over 30 years I had walked along that street and by the time I descended back into the Red Line Metro Station, I felt like the mask looking down from the El Capitan Theater. Screaming in horror. Well, maybe laughing a little bit, too. Or maybe that mask is laughing at the Jimmy Kimmel Theater next door.
Where movie stars really live
Those of us who live in L.A. know that real movie stars live behind stout gates in Malibu, or Brentwood, or high up in the Hollywood Hills. But tourists flock to see the stars–the ones embedded in the sidewalk–then eat at the Disney soda fountain, and gawk at gigantic elephants towering high up on the top of a shopping mall.
They take snapshots of a statue of Marilyn Monroe sitting on a table, courtesy Madame Tussauds. They chat with and click their cameras at costumed movie characters wandering around. (How do they make money from their costumed antics anyway?) And finally they book a tour bus trip to see movie stars homes–or former home–or just cruise around Hollywood.
Marilyn Monroe on Hollywood Boulevard
I really wonder what they tell their friends when they get back home. That they spent a bunch of money in a Hollywood themed open air shopping mall? Probably not. They may not realize what Hollywood Blvd. is all about: money and sales tax. Movie stars and their stars embedded in the sidewalks are just the bait. And the only reason actors come to Hollywood Blvd. is to attend award shows or be on Jimmy Kimmel’s show.
Originally published 2017.
